I know I’m two weeks late but I pray you all had a great Mother’s Day. Whether you’re a first-time mom, expecting mom, or someone quite like myself who has been in the game for a minute, I hope the day was full of the things that bring you joy and things that reminded you of why being a mother is in fact one of the greatest/hardest titles you’ll carry. If you’re not a mom yet and desire to be, you’ll understand why I say this when your journey starts.
As a mommy, being in the midst of this pandemic, I found that I was essentially, essential in all areas of my life. To be honest that was quite taxing. Like wait, not only is the world a bit crazy but, for a bit I had to go to work, then come home and become a teacher, along with all my other motherly duties. I don’t know about y’all but there were some days I was barely making it. For me, during this time it has been important for me to stay connected to the source of all things- God. Admittedly, even with staying connected, I’ve had my moments.
Anywho, my Mother’s Day wasn’t full of good food and me posting pictures of my children. It was full of pain (unimaginable pain might I add) that provided me with one of God’s greatest gifts…again…
Psalm 127:3 says it like this:
Behold children are a heritage from the Lord, The fruit of the womb a reward.- AMPC
That’s right… I spent Mother’s Day giving birth to another tiny human. Now let me be clear, this experience wasn’t anything like the others. First let me shout out the women who have natural births all the time… Y’all got it ok?! Although the pain was definitely worth it, I can whole heartedly say…NEVA (never) again! I mean for those who enjoy it, more power to you! Next time, (and I say this lightly) this momma is going to need the meds. Trust me I say this with no shame. Have you ever seen the movie “Baby Mama”? If you have, then you’ll understand this:
I mean sheesh, it was solely by the Grace of God that I made it through. Trust me, I’m not being dramatic. This was definitely an eye-opening experience for me. It made me think about the women around the world without proper healthcare. How are they doing this? What about the black and brown bodies we lose almost daily to childbirth?
For whatever reason with this pregnancy, I was more aware of women dying during childbirth, than anything else. Like women are dying during childbirth, due to various reasons. One of the major reasons being that people (Doctors/nurses) are not listening to them, when they say something is off. But let me be clear, there are various reasons why women die during childbirth, that’s just one. This was hard for me to process.
Like men are coming home without their wives. Left to raise children, without the person that was supposed to be there. This was a scary thought for me. Like honestly, I’d never paid attention to the fact that this was actually out here happening. How do I prepare? How do I make sure my husband is prepared? What about my children? I remember at one point during my labor, I honestly felt like this might be it, and what I remembered most, is not kissing my two babies ( who aren’t really babies) before we left for the hospital.
With this pregnancy, I hired a doula and made a birth plan… all for COVID-19 to swoop in and shut everything down. My doula couldn’t be present physically. But virtually she was amazing. The support was still felt and needed.
Shameless plug: If you’re pregnant, working on becoming pregnant, or if you’ve just had a baby and need some postpartum support check out The Black Birth Healer. Even during this uncertain time, her ability to adapt and make sure that I, as her client felt comfortable was amazing. We had a virtual check in two days before I went into labor and she went down a list of reminders for me to keep in mind while in labor. During my labor, she was available the whole time via phone(due to COVID). She checked in frequently and provided tips and reminders. The bottom line is, she’s one of the best doula’s out, HIRE HER! You can check out her Facebook here.
So yea, now we’re back in the game.. lol We’re two weeks in and have kinda adjusted to not only having three kids but a newborn. My Mother’s Day was perfect, even if it wasn’t filled with all the things that it’s typically filled with. I mean, what’s greater than receiving one of God’s greatest gifts on a day, that’s dedicated to you anyway? And if that isn’t the icing, I’ll get to remind my tiny human of how I spent Mother’s Day giving birth and how daddy was sick of me by the time labor was over lol. Next time, give me the meds.